In a coffee shop near Waterloo
I sat there, the phone ringing
Chatting and telling emotional
Untruths. Or the truth.
or locked up emotion

That feels
like lies

as the coffee slipped
into my system
one friend then an ex
the conversation continued up
towards The Strand and I looked for soap
with headphones of Led
— you spoke of my infidelity
— I denied it
— but you were right
the best of both worlds
or the mismatch of our ideals
one of us was wrong
or both were right
later I heard a child kill someone
and a doctor prescribed heroin
as we had spent the day chatting
Sunday went away
in a haze of coffee adrenalin
and I imagined Bukowski
doing his own version
in a haze of booze
as a day full of promise
has spiralled down
into lies, desire and frustration
— and forgotten songs from the past

for a moment I imagined
boats, the sea, limitless horizon

Rainbow
skies

being happy
world peace
no bad deeds
goodness in all people
endless wonderful things

— all impossible